Christmassy dates

I have been in SUCH a Christmassy mood this month! WAY more so than I normally do. Not sure what it is this year but I'm feeling so festive.

And this has definitely shown in the amount of festive y dates I have had with ELB this month. However we are both on super tight budgets, so a lot of these have also been frugal festive fun. (What was that writing rule about alliteration?)

So as I'm sure you are all dying to know - here is my brief rundown of what we've been up to, and how it has been just so Christmassy!

Putting up the decorations

This has always been a big Christmas thing for me. Since moving out, it's been weird to now have to create my own traditions, and not always be at home to share in the old ones. Especially when you live alone and Christmas is generally a time for company. I was over the moon when back in the beginning of November ELB said he would love to put my decorations up with me. I was literally counting down the days!

I can often be quite Monica about my decorations too. But this year it felt so refreshing to just watch him delight in my various decorations (especially the ones bought in America) and decide on places to put them.

And I dont care what any feminists say - getting a man to do the difficult bits of climbing up high and hammering in nails is WELL worth it!

Walks around London

We spend an entire day walking from Liverpool Street to Surrey Docks farm where we'd heard there was a Christmas Fayre on. But we spent a blissful amount of time walking through the city, seeing the lights, drinking mulled wine in pubs and snuggling up against the cold of the Southbank.

When we got to the farm it was the teeniest little thing ever, but eating chestnuts as we walked around and took silly photos of the animals was very pleasent and reminded me about how much we need to value the simple things in life.

Christmas movies

How have I not watched Gremlins at Christmas for goodness knows how many years? How had he not watched the Muppets Christmas Carol since he was little? We don't know but we both quickly resolved those issues!

Mulled wine/Mulled cider

If you're having to spend a lot of time indoors because of the cold or lack of funds, make sure it smells festive - and also get drunk into the bargain! Nice one to combine with Christmas movies. Check out our Mulled Wine recipe here.

Lattes and last minute shopping

We took the bus into town purely to go to Starbucks and sit and enjoy the festive drinks. Starbucks obsession much? Nah surely not... Then we wandered around picking up a couple of last minute family bits before going for a last minute Chinese. The best bit? They gave us crackers and we got to sit there wearing the crowns! (Well I think he only did because I made him...)

Winter Wonderland

I had never been before, ELB could hardly believe his ears and immediately had to take me. Even though we're both broke it's well worth going if you are in London to soak up the Christmas atmosphere. My top tips:

• Take sandwiches and possibly take a thermos if you're really broke. Sit either in the carousel bar or by the firepit to enjou them.
• Invest in the ferris wheel - it's the best thing there! 
• Take loads of photos - especially by the polar bears.
• Don't get sucked in to making him win you a teddy because all the games are fixed.

And finally for the ultimate in making any date a Christmassy date...

Wear Christmas hats! 

(Even if he does protest a little...)

Single at Christmas

Christmas is one of those times of the year that seems made for couples. As soon as the temperature drops it seems couples start streaming out of the woodwork. Couples ice skating, couples sharing hot chocolate, couples holding hands in those sickening two handed mitten things. Blurgh...it's enough to want to make us singletons disappear under our duvets with a chocolate orange and not emerge until Spring.

But. There are many reasons why being independent and by yourself this festive season rocks! And if you don't believe us, have a look at our reasonings:

1. "Where are we going for Christmas?"
Have you ever had that awful conversation with a spouse? "Where are we spending Christmas this year?" The arguments that follow, the trade offs "Well if we spend Christmas Eve at your Mums, then Christmas Day at mine, then Boxing Day at your Grans" - then all the driving or overpriced cabs or haggling for lifts to get between all of those places. Wouldn't you rather spend three days at Mum's relaxing, getting pissed and not having to venture into the cold?

2. Think of the money you save
Owl's friend text her in excitement about the £500 gift she had just laid out on her other half. £500 is a lot to spend on one person by anyone's standards, and this friend has a big family with a lot of kids in it on a fairly modest income. That's crazy! Not to mention the stress that comes with finding that "perfect" gift. Want our advice? That's money that can be used to take yourself on a shopping spree in the January sales!

3. Eating guilt free 
Ok, so this one is kind of a given at Christmas anyway. It's Christmas after all. And we are in no way advocating unhealthy behaviour. However isn't it nicer to eat all those yummy goodies, choccies and alki-hol without worrying about being judged by your other half. Especially if you don't make it to the gym until the second week of January instead of the first.

4. Total control of the remote
DVD boxsets, BBC Specials, traditional movies, sometimes you just wanna watch what you want to watch. (Love Actually at least 3 times this month we think) And no, we don't care how awesome Die Hard is.....it's not a Christmas movie!

5. All the dating opportunities 
Christmas parties, work do's, more time out and about catching up with friends, not to mention New Years Eve! There are so many great opportunities to meet new people and arrange some fun dates to get you through January.


6. No sharingIn what should be a totally selfless time of year, you don't have to fight over the last green triangle....or give up your turn on the new Xbox game....or give your 3 year old niece her teddy bear back. Ok, we went too far. Maybe you should return the bear.

7. More time to see friends
Christmas seems to be the time everyone suddenly wants to catch up. As if the world will end on December 27th (This year its the 21st though - just a heads up) Being able to just go "Yup I'm free that day for more mulled wine" rather than checking in with the other half is extremely liberating.

8. Great excuse to volunteer
We all say it every year "I'm going to spend time helping a charity!" but lets be honest....how many of us have ever done that? If you find yourself single, but don't relish the thought of going home - do one of the best things you can ever do and be completely selfless over the holiday season. (Especially after eating all the green triangles)

Contact your local hostel, pet shelter, homeless centre, old folks home or hospice - they might all appreciate an extra pair of hands to cook, clean or entertain over the festive season. And if you're in London Crisis at Christmas are still looking for volunteers.

What about you? Do you have any other reasons to add as to why it's better to be blissfully single this time of year? Leave us a comment or send us a Tweet! Tweet to @GrabaSpoon

Game of Thrones guys

Warning, this post does contain spoilers (from the TV series having not read past book 1 yet). If you are planning on reading or watching this series or are only part way through please please please do not read ahead! This way be spoilers! 

You have been warned....this is a series you really don't want to have spoilers for. 

Whilst reading through the Game of Thrones Facebook page, I came across this article "GoT guys and whether you should marry them" this cracked me up and thought I needed to post my two-peneth worth on some of the hotties in this season!

And ladies be warned - there are a fair few of them! 

So in reverse order here are MY fav Thones guys, and why I would choose them. 

 Robb Stark

Gorgeous. In a slightly ruggedy way compared to his half brother Jon. But this is a man with a quiet confidence, who knows what he wants and how to get it. Especially when it comes to the girl he loves. 

Plus *that* scene of passion? Yum! 

Khal Drogo

*fans self* Woo! Now here's a man for if you ever needed a steaming hot pile of testosterone! He has that classic bad boy thing going on and although the abuse of women complex he has to start off with is not his best selling point, he becomes such a romantic loving thing when he meets the right girl. A classic case of "But I can change him!" And how cute are the nicknames "Moon of my life" and "My sun and stars"? 

Jon Snow

The eyes....oh the eyes...he has a bit of a Heath Ledger in "10 Things I hate about you" vibe about him. Despite his hard exterior you can see he has a softer side. He's not had the easiest youth and tries to put a brave face on things. Really you just want to look after him although like Ygtitte I think I'd need to put him in his place quite often and show him who's really in charge! I also love his sense of humour (that shows more in the books though) AND he has an adorable Direwolf. 

Tyrion Lannister

WHAT?! I hear women of the world cry. He's your FIRST choice? Over and above all the gorgeous strapping men you listed?! (And the ones you didnt. Hello Sean Bean anyone?) And yes I know it seems an odd choice but Tyrion has the strongest strength of character. This is a man who knows himself, his an intelligent man and although not a fighter; brave enough of fight when he needs to. Not to mention he is so god damn FUNNY! 

All of these things, along with his intense vulnerability that only those he truly trusts will ever see make him a pretty awesome guy if you ask me. On top of that he also has such a huge amount of love he wants to give to the right girl. When he finds someone that truly cares about him, he will love and cherish her above all else - even when he doesn't truly believe he deserves it. (End of season 2? I wept. Wept and sobbed for him with happiness!) 

Not to mention, that although described as fairly "ugly" in the books Peter Dinklage is pretty easy on the eye if you ask me! 

Bonus Jon Snow picture. Just for funsies!

He IS just that into you- and deep down you know it!

Owl and Panda are the self-proclaimed Queens of Overthinking. Don't let our well thought out blogposts fool you- when we get ourselves into a tizzy over a one word text from a date, it isn't a pretty sight. Luckily, we rarely tend to overthink at the same time, so when we have girly nights in, we can tell when the other is going overboard with analysations (spell check tells us that this is not a word, so we proclaim it to be one of "our words". Like "ponderments"...)

One of our downfalls is that we don't like to believe that a guy is too into us. We try to play it cool, and not assume that we are amazeballs. Instead we get self conscious and paranoid and this can lead to crazy musings over whether  a guy actually does like us.

Sitting on a long train ride one day, we were chatting about the Blockbuster "He's Just Not That Into You" starring Ben Affleck, Jennifer Aniston and Bradley Cooper (to name a few). If you haven't seen it, watch it. It's quite a fun and easy watch, prompting pauses and long conversations whilst Owl and Panda poured over and related each issue to our own lives over white wine and cake. Anyway, we won't spoil the plot, but suffice to say, it's all there in the title. How to know when a guy isn't into you. Or when a girl just isn't into a guy.

But sometimes, we need just as much help to see that a guy actually IS into us. We don't want to be big-headed, but guess what? Some guys do actually want to be with us! And there is no problem with admitting to ourselves that sometimes we rock- and the guy thinks so too! So, on our train journey, with a couple of hours to spare, we came up with a list of tell-tell signs, just as a reference. If you're trying to work out whether a guy IS in fact into you, please have a look, and let us know if it has worked for you too. If you have more to add to the list – please please tell us in the comments. Goodness knows we could do with some more clues….

If he likes you:

1. He calls.

You don't have to worry about him contacting you. You've given him your details. He will get in contact.  Panda remembers a time where she met a guy at a club. Her friends and his friends were all talking, and contacts were shared throughout the night, however, the guy Panda was chatting to got a little (ahem) drunk and she didn't give him her number. Two days later, her friend contacted her. Apparently, his friend contacted her friend to give Panda the message that he wanted to apologise for being drunk and would love to have her contact details. He went above and beyond to track Panda down. Certainly, a sign that he was into her.

2. He talks to his friends about you.

Women talk. So do men. Do NOT let them fool you on this! Perhaps they don't talk in the same way as women, but they are guilty of sharing their musings with their closest chums. Don't be fooled, if he likes you, he would've more than mentioned you to his closest friend or roommate. He may even slip up in conversation. Owl learned this when she went to ELB’s house for the first time, and was introduced. She noticed the tone of the "this is 'Owl'" and noted the reaction of recognition from the roommates. Sure enough, they were already familiar with her presence in his life.

The differences between men and women talking...

3. He makes time.

It doesn't matter how busy he is- he will find the time because he wants to be in your company. Flip it over- when you want to see him, it doesn't matter if you've worked a 12 hour day, and your feet hurt, and your exhausted, and you have promised to take your Gran shopping the following morning- you will get on that 3 hour train to a different city to spend some time with him. We've all done it. And if he likes you, he will make the time to see you too…or even include you in his already made plans.

4. He takes notice of the things you like, and acts upon it.

He's asked all the questions and you've told him the things that you like. Not only has he listened, he has acted. This could be simply knowing that you like a particular chocolate bar and has bought it for you on your next date. But we would go a step further. For instance, Owl met a guy who listened to her like of a particular band. With this knowledge, he found other bands that sounded like this one, and told her about them. He had noticed her likes and was already making connections. You just don’t go that amount of effort for someone you're not into.

5. You just know.We women have been blessed with the ability of intuition. Nevertheless, all too often, we ignore our judgements, or displace them completely, in the fear of seeming presumptuous, or even... needy. But if a guy likes you, it doesn't matter whether you think you are overthinking. If you just relax and look at the evidence in front of you, you just KNOW. You don't have to overthink his every move. Sometimes we like to be modest, and not assume that the guy is totally smitten with is (unless you are a self-assured Panda who couldn't possibly believe someone isn't attracted to her!) But you know when he likes you back. His behaviour and actions show it.

We are not denying that there are some Casanova's out there, some men who make sport of leading girls on. But just trust your intuition, and you can answer the question yourself.

Not that we are not advocating sitting with your girls and having a good old chat about all the possibilities of whether he IS just that into you – over-analysing can sometimes be extremely helpful and fun too ;)

On meeting the parents

Ahh meeting the family - a terrifying situation for even the bravest of us! The worries and questions that go through our minds, all boiling down to one question "Will I make a good impression - will they like me?"

Because ultimately thats what we all want isnt it? We really like someone, we see it having potential to go somewhere, and there is nothing worse than the potential future "one day" in-laws not liking you and making a relationship difficult.

I've been in both camps. One boyfriend's mother welcomed me in with wide warm arms (literally) and then cried when I saw them for the last time when I picked up my stuff. By contrast one boyfriends mother would barely allow me through the front door, let alone upstairs.

The last one - the very nearly "mother in law" I never quite figured out 100% I worked hard to make a good impression and show her how much I cared for my then partner. She always said what she thought, so even though sometimes she was brutally honest, when she said she cared about me and loved me I believed her. I think it was actually quite difficult for her when it ended....it was for me too. I missed her. 

So having been through a number of relationships with varying degrees of closeness to the mothers, I was really nervous this time. I "quite" like ELB and I really didn't want to mess it up early on by not making a good impression. I worried for the best part of a week over my outfit, went to three different shops on the way to buy a bottle of fizz as recommended by ELB and then stressed out when my well planned hair-do got messed up through *cough cough* "extra curricular activities" before I'd even met them.

I needn't have worried. The answer is simple - just be yourself. How many people have heard their partners tell them this "Just be yourself and they'll love you as much as I do". Your partner likes you for a reason, hopefully a number of reasons, and chances are his family is fairly similar to him and so should like you too. Lets be brutally honest here - if he really thought you wern't going to get on, he wouldn't be bringing you home.

Even so here are my top tips for making it go as smoothly as possible:

• Dress modestly, but still be YOU. I went for a sweater dress that is maybe a *tad* shorter than generally acceptable for meeting parents but I had inch thick tights and practical knee high boots that made the outfit very "me" but still respectable. Also make sure its seasonally appropriate  That floaty maxi dress might be appropriate but you will just look silly wearing that in November! 
• Bring a gift if appropriate  Even something small will make a good impression. I was meeting them all on brothers birthday so I brought a bottle of fizz. That ELB then embarrassed me about  as he kept mentioning it every 10 minutes. Bless him :)
• Watch your language. I have an awful habit of swearing like a sailor no matter the company I keep so I consciously thought about everything before I said it. I'm sure over time the less offensive words in correct context wouldn't be so bad if its part of you, but on the first meeting you want to appear as ladylike as possible!
• Talk about subjects you care about - if you enjoy your job, tell them why. Loving a TV show or book at the moment - ask if they've seen or read it. Be engaging, ask questions about them. Remember the idea here is to get to know each other better. 
• Let them see you care about their son. A hand hold, sneaky peck on the cheek, smiling at him and complimenting him all show how much you care about him. HOWEVER - gushy smushy OTT PDA's and you will gross out the family - so be classy about it. 
• If they subject you to a "lie detector test" it's probably time to leave....

Do you have any "Meet the Parents" success tales? What about any horror stories? Tweet to @GrabaSpoon

"Being alone SUCKS!" How I get back to positive

If you're anything like me, you've suffered from the mild depression that comes from being single. Like Rachel in Friends said so elegantly: "This SUCKS! Being alone SUCKS!"

This, of course isn't always true, sometimes being single is great! There's no one to be responsible for... um... errr... well, I'm sure there are other reasons (ask me again when I'm not in a "being single SUCKS" mood). When that "I'm alone" feeling sinks in deep, it's hard to feel positive about it.

Especially when your friends all seem to be happily married, in a relationship or dating. I love all my friends, and I am genuinely happy for every single one of them. But I'm sure you guys know what I mean when I say "why can't it be me!"

I've felt this way before. I flit in and out of it from time to time, sometimes its triggered by hormones (you ladies know what I mean), sometimes it's the cold weather. Other times I have no idea what it is. All I know for sure is, it is reversible. I have come up with a few ways to get myself out of the slump. Let me know what you think about them!

mmmmmmmmmmmm

Gym

Work it out. I find exercising actually does increase my ability to feel happy. I burn some nervous energy, I feel healthier for it (and it eats up some of my alone time!) If you're joined to a nice gym, there are also sexy men to sneakily ogle at (don't lie to yourself, we all do it!)

Food

Eating my favourite meal. This may appear to fly in the face of the previous point, but for me, the previous point is less about losing or maintaining weight, its more about feeling exercised and refreshed. Eating my favourite meal always makes me feel satisfied. I am not advocating binge eating. This isn't helpful (and would definitely negate the previous point!) This could be something off a Chinese menu, or some good old chip shop chips. Or a slice of carrot cake with a hot chocolate. Whatever floats the boat.

Happy Film

I throw on a Happy Film. I have a couple on my list, including Iron Man and The Hangover 2. Don't ask why they are my happy films, I don't quite understand it myself, but I always get a giddy feeling when I watch them. It puts me in a much better mood.

I should note here that although Love Actually is another one of my Happy Films, I wouldn't advocate any lovey-dovey movies whilst in the "alone SUCKS" mode. I've done it before- tears and wet tissues everywhere, and there was no turning back at the end- I was firmly in the "Being alone SUCKS" zone.

Guilty Pleasures

This is a guilty pleasure. And it does make me feel a little bad to admit it. But, although I am single, there are a couple of guys that have a small thing for me. They are cool guys, and I have made it perfectly clear to them that they are JUST friends. But sometimes, I just want a little male company. So, I may call one up, have a quick chat. It can be nice to speak to someone who fancies me, nevertheless, I never lead them on.

This can sometimes backfire, if they are busy and can't talk, or they have girlfriends or whatever. So I never leave this as a last resort, it has a weird way of knocking down my house of cards.

Get pretty and dance

This is my secret, so don't laugh. I'll sit down, give myself a mani-pedi, then wash, scrub, mask, cleanse, tone, moisturise my face off, straighten my hair and walk around the house in my cute PJs. I look pretty. For me. Then, I throw on my favourite dance track and go wild! I just focus on the music. No sad songs- just upbeat ones!

GET OUT OF THE HOUSE

So important. I get out. Immediately. Yes, a small amount of wallowing is normal. But when your reaction to natural light is to hiss and squint like a deranged cat, it's time to be outside. I go for a walk around a nice area, or sit for a coffee in a nice coffee shop. Sometimes I get on a bus and look at the sights. Whatever gets me out and about. I know for me, being inside for a long time means extended periods in my own head. And in this type of mood, that's not safe.

These exercises usually get me through a weekend, or however long it is until I have to be somewhere or do something that takes my mind off my woes. Then, I'm back to my jolly, positive-thinking self. Being single isn't all that bad. There are some good points (again, when I have done the above I'll be in a better place to list what they are).

What would be on your list? Let me know so I can add it to mine!

The List

I was having a chat with Owl, due to my "hot and cold" nature when dealing with dates. I don't know about all you wonderful people out there in the real world, but I have a natural propensity to go off of men quite easily. It could be little things, such as him wearing a leather jacket in blazing heat, or not picking up the bill at the end of a meal. For me, it's the little things that show the type of person you are. After all, anything you do is everything you do.

Anyway, back to my chat with Owl. During our convo, it occurred to me that I actually do have a list in my head around what the perfect man for me would be like. I guess I have compiled the list over the years, taking the things I like from ex-boyfriends and reversing the things that pissed me off.

This conversation is reminiscent of a chat I had about a year ago with another friend. She is a Christian, and after going on various dates, she decided to make a list of the qualities of the perfect man and put that list in her Bible. Within months, the perfect man was in her life. Although (not to put a downer to this point, I should mention that they split up after about 6 months. Turns out, he was perfect as far as the list was concerned, but she changed her mind over what she wanted). I am not a Christian, but I do have a belief in the Laws of Attraction, and can see the logic behind this activity. If you want something in life, you need to focus on it, and ensure your focus is clear.

So below is my list. It's quite a long one, so bare with me. Some of the items on the list are general, and I am sure can be applied to most women's dream of the "Perfect Man". But even those points are specific to what I want in a man.

Panda's List

• Someone that makes me laugh from the pit of my stomach, daily. This is at the top of the list for a reason- it's so very important to me!
• Someone that understands my dry, sarcastic humour and appreciates it.
• Someone who really enjoys my company. And I really enjoy theirs. Sounds obvious, right?
• Someone that does not smoke. And only really drinks socially. And doesn't do drugs.
• Someone tall, dark and handsome. He should be taller than me when I wear heels.
• Someone from my background (Black Caribbean)- although I must admit this is not essential, it just makes things easier (in terms of understanding my heritage and dealing with my family).
• Someone who appreciates my religious choices. He doesn't have to agree with them, of course and I will appreciate his. As long as there is an open and respectful dialogue.
• Someone without hair (can't be dealing with looking after his hair AND my own!). He doesn't need to be bald; a low, manageable cut is fine with me.
• Someone athletic, perhaps studies a martial art and attends the gym. Someone fit and healthy, and is concerned with his health. He should have beautiful muscles and a healthy physique, but he doesn't have to look like The Rock... although if he does, I wouldn't complain...
• Someone who is competitive like me. I like to play games and have a laugh. It's more than just taking part, you know...
• Someone who is (ahem) well endowed, and knows what he is doing. I can teach him the rest ;)
• Someone who is willing to try new experiences and teach me a few things (link to above point, as appropriate).
• Someone who loves their job- whatever it is. Although I'd prefer not to have a Police Officer or a Fireman, I don't like the shifts that they do. Loving their career means they are happier in life!
• Someone who wants to make me happy in any way possible.
• Someone that wants to take care of me. This doesn't mean I will stop taking care of myself, but having someone be there for me for a change would be nice...
• Someone who wants a family- children- and who believes in putting their family first.
• Someone who has friends and enjoys spending time with them. A Billy-no-mates really doesn't appeal to me. My friends are important to me, and I can't have him trying to tag along with me all the time, or moan when I am not spending all my free time with him. It just wouldn't work for me.  
• Someone who is good with their hands around the house, and is willing to learn to fix anything!
• Someone who is not stubborn, who can admit when they are wrong and get over things. And doesn't throw things in my face.
• Someone who is able to talk about their feelings, although I don't want someone who whines about things or goes on and on. Just the ability to open up and talk about things is enough for me.
• Someone that earns more than I do. I used to be quite "feminist thinking", however I now feel that (personally speaking) my guy can earn more and contribute more to the household than me. I will, of course, play my part and pay my way.
• Someone who is good with their money, sensible but not cheap!
• Someone who likes to travel and is willing to try new experiences with me.
• Someone that LOVES me. And I love them back. Again, so obvious, but so essential.

I doubt this list is exhaustive. I am sure there will be a man out there that will piss me off and have me add something else to it. I am reminded by Owl that although these are things I want in a man, I should also remember to be flexible. The truth is, any man could walk into my life and totally change my perspective on what I want. Look at my Christian friend! Although, this list has made me look at a couple of the men I have been on dates with, and is explaining a current feeling of "meh" I have towards all of them....

Have any of you out there ever made a list? And what have you added to it? And has the process of making a list made it easier for you to focus on what you are looking for? And, of course, has it worked?

Panda would love to know!

What are you looking for?

So, there comes a time, whether its during messaging on an internet site, on a first date, or over the phone, when a seemingly simple question is asked...

"What are you looking for in a man?"

How do YOU answer such a question? When we were younger, the obvious answer was to describe the person opposite you "well I'm looking for a tall, dark and handsome man, short and spiky hair with a beauty spot under his left cheek..." (of course this was providing you actually liked the person you were looking at ;) Are a bit old for that old ploy now?

I was asked this recently, and I wasn't sure how to reply. Thank the universe for the expected pause between messages! I eventually replied "I'm looking for someone who is honest, has a high integrity, treats me with respect, is happy in his work, is loyal and is faithful." Er, who isn't looking for this wondrous being? The fact is, aren't we all looking for that in a person? The real question is, what specific qualities am I looking for?

Basically, my ideal guy is made up of all the good parts of the men I have dated in the past, minus all the crappy annoying baggage they came with. Call me the ever pessimist, but I think that if I was to describe my perfect man, no one could ever live up to that expectation (and I would end up scaring every guy off!) I mean, I have a specific height, shape and skin-tone, I know what I would like his hair to look like, his favourite movies to be, his choice of career, his choice of football team, his favourite order on a Chinese takeaway list... It's a ridiculous list of perfection, and knowing my luck, that guy would walk into my life and probably not go for me anyway. I'm more realistic than that. And I think I wouldn't mind being with someone who didn't have all of these qualities wrapped up in a neat package...

Is it ever a good idea to just say "I don't know"? to this question? Does this set an unrealistic tone? Does this mean "I'll settle for whatever you give me"? And what if the person opposite you does not meet your idea of "what you are looking for"? Do you just down your drink in one and bid them farewell?

I guess my overall question is this: how do YOU answer this question? Examples would help, or just your general ideas. I want to be able to answer this question better in the future.

Tweet to @GrabaSpoon Thoughts please!

Top 10 reasons why dating is awesome

• We decided to make our first blog post a bit fun, to give you an idea of the conversations that happen between Owl and Panda, and an insight into our dating worlds. So here you have our top 10+ reasons why we think dating is great!

  (This is an actual transcript of our Facebook conversation discussing this!)

  

  
  Owl: So what should our first blog post be about? 

  
  Panda: How about a how to guide or a list or a top 10?

  
  

  O: Ooh yeah top 10! "Top 10 reasons why dating rules?"

  
  

  P: "No 1. You get a lot of free meals"

  
  

  O: "Hmm I'm not sure I agree with that one, but ok a definite reason! How about...getting to explore and find out new places?"

  
  

  P: Okay, No 3: you get to dress up! minus the stress of finding something to wear... your turn!

  
  O: Yes! Thats a good one! Umm...that excited gooey feeling when they text you? That feelings awesome!

  
  P: 5 You have met someone who likes you and wants to get to know you better in person... yeah, that is nice!

  
  O: I guess this kind of links in but the geek in me makes this another point. Discovering those shared interests and "ME TOO!" moments.

  
  P: first kisses

  
  O: "Second kisses" (had to get a friends quote in there!)

  
  P: Lol! Talking about it with your friends! 

  
  O: Flirting 

  
  

  P: Sweet texts 

  
  O: hehe amen to that one! What are we up to now? 

  
  

  

  
  P: 11 lol. Should we stop? Because I think I can probably think of 10 reasons why dating sucks sometimes

  
  O: I think thats a whole other blog post!  How about we round it off with the all round fuzzy feeling (I wont say butterflies) you get? 

  
  P: Ah, yes, fuzzy. We loves fuzzy lol

  
  

  
  

  
  

  Tweet to @GrabaSpoon Tell us why you think dating is awesome!