Owl and Panda are the
self-proclaimed Queens of Overthinking. Don't let our well thought out blogposts
fool you- when we get ourselves into a tizzy over a one word text from a date,
it isn't a pretty sight. Luckily, we rarely tend to overthink at the same time,
so when we have girly nights in, we can tell when the other is going overboard
with analysations (spell check tells us that this is not a word, so we proclaim
it to be one of "our words". Like "ponderments"...)
One of our downfalls is that we don't
like to believe that a guy is too into us. We try to play it cool, and not
assume that we are amazeballs. Instead we get self conscious and paranoid and this
can lead to crazy musings over whether a
guy actually does like us.
Sitting on a long train ride one
day, we were chatting about the Blockbuster "He's Just Not That Into
You" starring Ben Affleck, Jennifer Aniston and Bradley Cooper (to name a
few). If you haven't seen it, watch it. It's quite a fun and easy watch, prompting
pauses and long conversations whilst Owl and Panda poured over and related each
issue to our own lives over white wine and cake. Anyway, we won't spoil the
plot, but suffice to say, it's all there in the title. How to know when a guy isn't
into you. Or when a girl just isn't into a guy.
But sometimes, we need just as
much help to see that a guy actually IS into us. We don't want to be
big-headed, but guess what? Some guys do actually want to be with us! And there
is no problem with admitting to ourselves that sometimes we rock- and the guy
thinks so too! So, on our train journey, with a couple of hours to spare, we
came up with a list of tell-tell signs, just as a reference. If you're trying
to work out whether a guy IS in fact into you, please have a look, and let us
know if it has worked for you too. If you have more to add to the list – please
please tell us in the comments. Goodness knows we could do with some more
clues….
If he likes you:
1. He calls.
You don't have to worry about him
contacting you. You've given him your details. He will get in contact. Panda remembers a time where she met a guy at
a club. Her friends and his friends were all talking, and contacts were shared
throughout the night, however, the guy Panda was chatting to got a little
(ahem) drunk and she didn't give him her number. Two days later, her friend
contacted her. Apparently, his friend contacted her friend to give Panda the
message that he wanted to apologise for being drunk and would love to have her
contact details. He went above and beyond to track Panda down. Certainly, a
sign that he was into her.
2. He talks to his friends about
you.
Women talk. So do men. Do NOT let
them fool you on this! Perhaps they don't talk in the same way as women, but
they are guilty of sharing their musings with their closest chums. Don't be
fooled, if he likes you, he would've more than mentioned you to his closest
friend or roommate. He may even slip up in conversation. Owl learned this when she went to ELB’s house for the first
time, and was introduced. She noticed the tone of the "this is 'Owl'"
and noted the reaction of recognition from the roommates. Sure enough, they
were already familiar with her presence in his life.
3. He makes time.
It doesn't matter how busy he is-
he will find the time because he wants to be in your company. Flip it over-
when you want to see him, it doesn't matter if you've worked a 12 hour day, and
your feet hurt, and your exhausted, and you have promised to take your Gran
shopping the following morning- you will get on that 3 hour train to a
different city to spend some time with him. We've all done it. And if he likes
you, he will make the time to see you too…or even include you in his already
made plans.
4. He takes notice of the things
you like, and acts upon it.
He's asked all the questions and
you've told him the things that you like. Not only has he listened, he has
acted. This could be simply knowing that you like a particular chocolate bar
and has bought it for you on your next date. But we would go a step further.
For instance, Owl met a guy who listened to her like of a particular band. With
this knowledge, he found other bands that sounded like this one, and told her
about them. He had noticed her likes and was already making connections. You just
don’t go that amount of effort for someone you're not into.
5. You just know.We women have been blessed with
the ability of intuition. Nevertheless, all too often, we ignore our
judgements, or displace them completely, in the fear of seeming presumptuous,
or even... needy. But if a guy likes you, it doesn't matter whether you think
you are overthinking. If you just relax and look at the evidence in front of
you, you just KNOW. You don't have to overthink his every move. Sometimes we
like to be modest, and not assume that the guy is totally smitten with is
(unless you are a self-assured Panda who couldn't possibly believe someone
isn't attracted to her!) But you know when he likes you back. His behaviour and
actions show it.
We are not denying that there are
some Casanova's out there, some men who make sport of leading girls on. But
just trust your intuition, and you can answer the question yourself.
Not that we are not advocating
sitting with your girls and having a good old chat about all the possibilities
of whether he IS just that into you – over-analysing can sometimes be extremely helpful and fun too ;)